Midnight
12/28/2004 - 1/24/2020I had never heard the term "heart dog" until a few days ago as I spent my night googling how to deal with the loss of a beloved pet. Midnight, you were mine. There will never be another like you. Oh how I wish you could be healthy, happy, and here with me again. I miss you so, so much. My heart is so broken. For almost 16 years I've had you in my life and I just had to say my final goodbye. You were the best companion anyone could ask for. You had so much love for everyone and everyone loved you in return. The light of my life, my little pumpkin, my angel. I'll miss waking up to see you snoring in your bed next to me. I'll miss your stinky kisses. I'll miss you poking your head behind the shower curtain to check on me. I'll miss throwing snowballs to you. I'll miss you being by my side at all times. It already feels so empty without you. I'm so grateful that you were able to pass peacefully in my arms at home, that I could hold you and pet you as you went to sleep. I stroked your head, your paws, your tail. I had the hardest time letting you go, but I know you were ready. You will be so missed, baby. It feels wrong not preparing your breakfast in the morning. I still poke my head into the bedroom to check on you, even though I know I won't see you laying in my bed, tucked in where I left you. I still can't sleep at night because I'd become accustomed to staying up, quietly crying into your fur and being there for you when you needed help getting outside at 3 AM. I still walk over your bed, careful not to accidentally step on you. Sometimes I think I see your paws just around the corner, but it's only the blanket that covered you when you left us. It's been shoved aside and I don't have the heart to move it. I look behind me as I walk through the yard, expecting to see you following with a smile. I cry when I make dinner for your little brother because I should be making a dinner for you too. My arms feel empty as I go downstairs at night, not holding your weight as I carry you down to get ready for bed. I listen for your nails on the basement floor. The dining table remains where I had moved it to make space for us and the vet. I sleep with your collar and the last sweater you wore. I smell everything you touched and I regret bathing you one last time because now all I smell is the dog shampoo instead of your distinct scent. I touch the soft lock of fur that was cut from behind your ear. I look at your photos and the clay paw print. My mood drops every time I walk into the dining room because all I can see is myself sitting there sobbing with you in my arms, the vet knelt beside us. It will get easier, I know, but not yet. I feel weird and stupid for grieving so strongly, but you're irreplaceable. You and I loved each other like no other. I hope you're running around in the warm sun with all of your friends. Until we meet again.Verona, PennsylvaniaJanuary 27, 2020
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I am so sorry for your loss. I am at this website because I am making the decision to let go today. What you wrote could have been what I will write, almost exactly. I cannot imagine life without my little guy who has watched out for me his entire life, almost 15 years. Not a day has gone by that he has not made me his priority. I so want to do the right thing for him and spare him anymore pain and suffering. Holding on is just feeling selfish at this point because I won't know what to do with the emptiness when he is gone. Thank you so much for sharing and I wish you the best in the future.Cheryl Ann - January 28, 2020
I feel your pain ❤️ I lost Buddy yesterday. He was my little heart dog. I adopted him as a senior dog, and only had him a year and a half, but he loved me so much, and I loved him just as much. I don’t think he had ever bonded with anyone before.
Time will heal us both, and we will have those great memories.
Fair Sutherlin - January 27, 2020
Rest In Peace, sweet Midnight ♥️Sierra Hedrick - January 27, 2020

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