The bond between a pet and its owner is unique and everlasting, making a pet’s loss a devastating experience. After a loss, many pet parents feel guilty about adopting a new pet, feeling they are trying to replace their loved one. You likely wonder how long you should wait before getting another pet and what others might think. However, pet loss grief is complex and different for everyone. The right time to adopt a pet after losing a beloved companion is unique to your situation.
Grief is a personal journey, and grieving a pet can sometimes feel more complicated than grieving a human. This is because pet loss grief is less recognized and accepted by society, which can make you think that your feelings aren’t valid. But no one can tell you how you are or should be feeling—your feelings are real and matter. Allow yourself the time you need to mourn your lost companion and to do so in the way that feels right to you.
Healing from loss does not have a specified timeline. Take the time you need to remember and honor your pet while seeking support from friends, family, mental health professionals, or peers in pet loss support groups. Talking with someone who knows the pain of pet loss is best because those who haven’t owned a pet may not understand your special bond.
You don’t have to wait until you are “finished” grieving your lost pet to bring a new one home. This is especially true if you don’t have any other pets because animals provide emotional support, and coming home to an empty house can be challenging. Having another pet at home can ease the sting of a loss, not because you are using them as a distraction or replacing your pet with a new one, but because a pet’s presence can prevent loneliness, provide daily structure, and give you a reason to get out of bed each morning. However, if you don’t feel ready for weeks or months after the loss, that is OK, too.
Your new pet cannot and will not replace your bond and love for your lost pet. If you feel you are “cheating” on your other pet, remember that the bond you form with a new pet is something new, unique, and separate, and in no way detracts from your previous relationship. However, follow your instincts and don’t force a new relationship. If you struggle to feel a connection with potential new pets, it may be too soon.
Before bringing home a new pet, assess how your remaining pets feel about the loss. Some pets may grieve alongside you and benefit from companionship, while others need time to adjust to the new situation. Consider your pet’s temperament to determine if a new addition is a good idea and how another pet could change your household balance. If your existing pet is older, avoid bringing home a rambunctious puppy or kitten.
Grief can be confusing and overwhelming, and you may not know how you feel about bringing a new pet home. If you’re on the fence or concerned about your current pets, consider fostering before fully committing. The fostering experience is inherently rewarding, and although the pet eventually leaves your home, you’ve made an immeasurable difference in their life—possibly saving it altogether. If you enjoy the fostering experience, you can decide to adopt or continue fostering to help the local rescue community.
You can embrace this new chapter once you've taken the necessary steps and feel confident in your decision. Allow yourself to bond deeply with your new pet while acknowledging and remembering the pet you lost. Love is not static. Love evolves and grows with each new relationship and experience and cannot be erased.
Check out our pet loss support page for resources and support as you grieve your lost pet.